The Happiest Place on Earth

I see a not-so-hidden Mickey!

Jump in de line...

This nice young man had his picture taken as he was cutting ahead of approximate 200-300 people waiting in line at the entrance gate.

His excuse? He had a stroller.

Big Pumpkin

Now that's a really big pumpkin.

You can't get there from here

They shut down some of the walkways in Disneyland for parades and the fireworks. When they do hordes of employees come out and redirect you, making sure no one goes under the ropes and takes the short cut. Their job, for however long it lasts (hours, sometimes) is to say... you can't get there from here, you need to go around.

Autopia Fireworks

The autopia is less crowded during pyro (fireworks). You can see the fireworks through the trees as you drive. It is a little distracting. Don't crash in to the car in front of you!

Jack-o-rabbit

Roger Rabit makes an appearance as a Jack-o-Lantern.

Where trams go to die.

Where trams go to die.

Not the Canal Boats

Hello everybody, and welcome to Storybook Land! My name is April, and today we're riding aboard the Wendy. Today, I'll be taking you on a magical journey through Storybook Land, so please keep all hands and arms inside the boat, and please no smoking, drinking, eating, drugs, swearing, or standing up inside the boat… those that do will be asked to disembark before our return to the dock. And now without further ado, away we go!

Oh no! It looks like we’ve just been swallowed by Monstro the whale from the story of Pinocchio! If you remember the story, Monstro swallowed Pinocchio and Geppetto, and Pinocchio was smart enough to start a fire that made Monstro sneeze! He sneezed so hard, he blew his tail right off! Bad for Monstro, and not so good for us either, if you consider that we are about to be blown out the back end of a whale...

Coming up around the bend, on your left, you'll see the cave of the Big Bad Wolf… and directly across, you'll see the homes of the Three Little Pigs… one made of straw, one made of sticks, and one made of 100% wolf-proof bricks… The wolf has been trying to cross the canal and reach these rich sources of bacon for over 50 years now...

Up on your left-hand side, you’ll see the village of Alice in Wonderland… if you follow the white footpath to the bottom, you’ll see the mailbox of the White Rabbit… next to that is the very same burrow that Alice chased the White Rabbit into and discovered LSD.

Directly ahead are the formal gardens of London Park; that's where Wendy, John and Michael, with a little help from Peter Pan and Tinker Bell, started their adventures into Never-Never land, where they maintain a questionable living arrangement.

Up ahead is Agraba, the city of mystery and enchantment. On the hill is the sultan’s palace while just below is the busy marketplace where Aladdin and Jasmine first met.

We are now passing under the rose covered arches, the same rose covered arches that Aladdin and Jasmine flew under on their magic carpet ride. Just on the left there you can see the spot where they clipped the arch, flipped the carpet over and crashed in flames just past the bank there...

Watch your hands and fingers as we pass in to the cave of wonders, because we would not want to touch the enchanted treasure that lies inside, as it would cause the cave to collapse, trapping us inside for all time. Among that treasure is a lamp which Abu and Aladdin discovered containing a magical Genie.

On our right is the cottage of Snow White and the seven dwarves. Yes, that's right. That's where the beautiful princess lives with seven men. Together. Just beyond you can hear the dwarves as they whistle while they work in the mine.


Across the way is the Chateau where Cinderella grew up with her evil step sisters and evil step mother until one night she attended a ball high on the hill at the prince’s palace. You might even be able to catch a glimpse of her carriage as it turns in to a pumpkin. Just hope she isn't inside when this happens... not a pretty sight.

On our left is a giant patchwork quilt, inspired by Disney’s Lullaby Land from the Silly Symphonies. Rumor has it that once the park is closed, and everyone has gone home for the night, a giant comes to sleep under this giant quilt. The quilt is made up of 23 types of desert plants and held together by those giant cross stitches.

Just in case you were wondering, all our plant in Storybookland are real, and are kept miniaturized by a very special process known only by Tinkerbell. We have tried to get her to stop, but she can be a real bitch at times.

On our left is the modest home of Mr Mole, best friend of Mr Toad who is just up the way in Toad Hall from the Wind in the Willows. But, they are not home right now; they are on their way to a Gay Pride march. The last time they went driving together, they were arrested and held for reckless endangerment and violation of various public decency laws.

Up ahead set snuggly at the base of the Matterhorn is the Alpine Village where down by the water you can see Geppetto’s workshop. In that workshop, Geppetto made Pinocchio, the little wooden boy. There is still speculation in the village as to why this reclusive old man would have wanted a wooden boy with a long pointy nose to play with.

Docked in the harbor to our right is Prince Eric’s ship. On the beach, Ariel rescued the prince and they now live together in the beautiful palace, financed almost completely through drug running and rum smuggling.

Through the waterfall on our left you might be able to catch a glimpse of King Triton’s Palace where Arial grew up, and her friends Sebastian and Flounder still live, having overthrown King Triton in a coupe financed and supported by a sea witch that lives just under where our boat is sitting right now. I think thats one of her tentacles just creaping over the edge of the boat there...

Fruit in a Doggie Dish

Fruit in a Doggie Dish.

Not-so Hidden Mickey in Pirates

There is an unofficial hidden Mickey in the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. As you enter the waters where the pirate ship is bombarding the castle walls with cannon fire, look at the stone walls.

Here you see three cannonball holes which form a rather nice Mickey.








Here is a closer and slightly enhanced view.





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Death by Locomotive

A frightening aspect of riding Mr. Toad's wild ride is smashing in to an oncoming locomotive. The whistle, the approaching light at the end of the tunnel, the subsequent crash... all very disturbing.

Here is the oncoming locomotive, illuminated. Scary, huh?

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Mystery Metal

Here we have something you don't see every day... well, you would if you worked in Disneyland.

What is it?

(Click in picture for larger image)

Maggots and Blood

The other night, we were going through a Disney line, getting food to eat.

To my surprise, I saw they were serving maggots. Here they are. Maggots and blood.

OK... so its actually a shrimp cocktail, but it sure reminded me of maggots and blood.

Not all the food at Disneyland is of the highest quality. Actually, not much of it is.

(Click for a larger picture, at your own risk)

Stars with the Lights On

If you ever wondered what stars looked like with the lights on, here is your chance. In the Peter Pan ride, guests fly in the sky, actually traveling above the stars.

Late at night, after the guests go home, the lights go on and you can see the stars. They are actually a mass of small wires sticking up out of the foor.

Here we see the island of Never Never Land, surrounded by wire stars.

A different view of Never Never Land, with more wires, looking like weeds growing up.

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Toad Books

Mr. Toad was an avid reader. Look out for these books on his Wild Ride. They are difficult to see as you zip by.

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Max, Luke and Melvin

Strange stuffed animal heads. Do you know where these appear in Disneyland?

Hidden Mickey in the Window

Can you see the hidden Mickey?

Where was this picture taken?

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Chinese Lamps

Where was this picture taken?

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A Giant Fire

A giant fire, even in the summertime, adorns the lobby of the Grand California hotel.

The fireplace is large enough to crawl in to.

I saw someone actually climb in once. Unfortunately, the fire does burn all day and night all year around.

Toad's Mouth

Toad of Toad Hall presides over the line of guests waiting to take his ride.

Toad is made of wood, and is within easy touching distance of all the guests in line. As a result of course, everyone reaches out and touches him, especially in his mouth.

His tongue is worn smooth from people touching it, the paint rubbed off. Disney repaint periodically, but they can't keep up. Just think... of all the germs of all the little kids that have stuffed their hands in that mouth.

Go ahead. I dare you.

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Dumbo

The Dumbo ride at night. Its been refurbished a number of times and has nice lighting at night.

It goes fast, but not too fast.

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Captain Jack Sparrow

When the Pirates of the Carribean ride was first invented, Captain Jack Sparrow did not exist.

With Disney's new push to create movies from rides (hey it worked the other way, and they were running out of ideas), Jack Sparrow was born. His likeness has been added to the ride, as a retrofit. It adorns the walls of the ride entrance, along with other lesser known pirates.

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